|Re: Through the looking glass #2||<– Date –> <– Thread –>|
|From: lilbert (lilbertconcentric.net)|
|Date: Wed, 5 Aug 1998 18:19:13 -0500|
Dear Patty, I'll tell you what is happening- your house is starting to feel like it belongs to you. You will learn how to set your boundaries. You are not wrong to worry about your carpet and utility bills! The construction people should NOT be using your stuff! Construction companies do this all the time to cut costs.That is called stealing, and you don't have to put up with it. Don't mistake them for a part of your community. They are not. They work for you, and you wouldn't put up with an employee stealing, would you? Also, don't leave your own tools lying around. They will disappear. Take them home with you every time until you occupy your new home. This is just experience, not an indictment of every construction worker. One way we at Southside have coped with kids running in and out is to require shoes off at the door. Most people here have this policy, and it works. Maybe a nice little sign outside will keep you from having to repeat yourself until it becomes a habit for everyone. This is your home, and you have every right to protect your investment. At some point, you will not feel comfortable with more people in your life, and you need to have these boundaries so that when the time for solitude comes, it won't be a shock to your friends. Also, some people have signs that they put up outside when they don't want knocks on the door. You won't believe how people (Kids too) respect that sign. Any way the driveways can be changed? If not now, it will never happen. Messy house. I've got one, and still have friends. Even after five years, there are still people here who I don't invite into my house. This is a big, lame, childhood issue with me, and I'm not over it. Maybe someday. You are not the only one in your group who is a slob. Do you think everyone's house looks like it does during the potlucks all the time? But the good thing is, you won't be spending as much time with guests in your house as you might think. Most social activities that involve more than one friend will end up in the common house, and the people you like most won't care about your poor cleaning habits. Moving in is extraordinarily stressful. Just because it's great, doesn't mean you won't have negative feelings. This too shall pass. Go out on the porch and have a beer. Someone will join you, and cohousing bliss will set in once again. Liz Stevenson Southside Park
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