Re: Conflict Resolution | <– Date –> <– Thread –> |
From: Unnat (Zeniinet.net.au) | |
Date: Thu, 3 Dec 1998 18:51:17 -0600 |
Hi everyone, I must acknowledge Rob Sandelin on his advice some time ago re reaching an agreeable pets policy. Simply, try to understand the NEED rather than focus on the WANT. eg, I remember one member became adamant that the placing of the commonhouse in the central terrace would mean that her son wouldn't have room to kick his football. I was one who reacted to this as an unreasonable 'block' to concensus. There was nowhere else to put the damn thing anyway! The meeting ended tense and unresolved. Later I spoke to my friend. Her real concern was that she wouldn't be able to see so far into the common area - the visual community - as she longed to do, because the commonhouse would be in the way. This was a need that I could hear and empathise with. So, the football thing was a red herring. We couldn't do anything about the location of the commonhouse, but my friend did get to express her disappointment once she located the real issue. I was able to suggest design changes to that side of the commonhouse that opened it up and created a special common area, ie a covered craft space and cool sitting area in summer. This concern has also been absorbed into our landscaping plans. This can be where 'tools' like 6 Thinking Hats can be useful to explore breadth and depth and enable all our different ways of viewing the world to be heard and brought together as equally valid components of the 'truth'. It includes expression of feelings and intuition. Another more zen 'tool' is to ask WHY, 3 times. eg, when things aren't shifting, people are asked to reflect quietly, on paper, why they want what they believe they want. Then ask themselves WHY about their response. And WHY again. They might be getting to what they need by now. I am temperamently pugnacious and find elegant conflict management an exciting challenge. It's such a thrill when it all comes together. Warmest regards Robyn Williams Pinakarri Community Fremantle, Western Australia
- RE: Conflict resolution, (continued)
- RE: Conflict resolution Rob Sandelin, March 1 1998
- Conflict Resolution mbishop, December 2 1998
- Re: Conflict Resolution Kevin Wolf, December 2 1998
- Re: Conflict Resolution David C. Ergo, December 2 1998
- Re: Conflict Resolution Unnat, December 3 1998
- Conflict Resolution mbishop, December 4 1998
- Re: Conflict Resolution Kevin Wolf, December 4 1998
- Re: Conflict Resolution Stevenson/Bitner, December 5 1998
- Conflict Resolution mbishop, December 7 1998
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