|Forming cohousing on shared interests and needs||<– Date –> <– Thread –>|
|From: Sharon Villines (SharonVillinesprodigy.net)|
|Date: Fri, 26 Feb 1999 17:30:22 -0600|
One thing that seems important in cohousing is the variety of interests and needs that multi-generational, non-ideological communities bring. It would be nice if a child were not the only disabled or adopted or blue-eyed blond in the group but if all the children shared the same needs it could create an odd unbalance in values and world views. When my daughter was about 10, we spent a whole dinner hour with her in tears, listing off the all the problems with her life. I was very concerned and shared with a friend my fear that this unhappiness was caused by a recent divorce and my being too busy with my own interests. My friend, a totally child-centered, full-time mom with a devoted husband and partner who shared fully the care of his children, responded, "We spent last night at dinner listening to exactly the same complaints from our oldest daughter." Instead of spending the next night trying to "make it up" to my daughter I went on as if life were just fine--and she did too. When I supervised a residence for wayward teenagers, the professional staff members (all young) were quite regularly identifying as deviant the normal behaviors of healthy teenagers. It was the two women who worked in the kitchen and had teenagers at home who were most helpful in "normalizing" the environment. Sharon Villines Synergy Cohousing, Delray Beach, FL http://www.cohousing.net
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