|RE: Circumstantial Community -Relationship expectations.||<– Date –> <– Thread –>|
|From: Fred H. Olson (fholsoncohousing.org)|
|Date: Fri, 13 Aug 1999 17:15:00 -0600 (MDT)|
On Sun, 1 Aug 1999, Rob Sandelin wrote: > In some places, > those relationships are very close, family-like, with a great deal of time > spent supporting and interacting with each other. In other communities the > relationships are considerably more distant, in fact, in one case, almost > strangers who have little contact with each other. > > In my workshops I sometimes use a connection scale excercise. I draw a line > with a 1 on one end and a 10 on the other. Interesting comments Rob. But I suspect the subjectivity of your scale even with your description might contribute some to the variability you found. Depends on things like what you expect of "family" and "typical neighborhood" etc. I think a survey that asked some specifics (a bunch ?) and then derived the continium based on the responses would be more useful. In your message you cited a few specifics which if stated as questions might be the start of a survey. (Questions could be phrased to ask about what respondant would prefer or about relationships with current neighbors) > I do not expect [most neighbors] > them to loan me a car, bring me food if I am ill, or care about me > and my life. Conversely, I expect all of those things of my neighbors in an > intentional community. > Question. Would you loan your car to a neighbor? Would you ask you neighbor to borrow their car? Have you ever borrowed (loaned) your car... Rob, I sort of recall you citing a list of specifics in a message to the list one time. Maybe ' Do you know what your neighbors do for a living? Do you know any of their relatives? ' sorts of questions. My neighborhood is of the 'circumstantial' variety but I also know that many of my neighbors have some things in common and many of us might rate the neighborhood above "5". Our potluck group (about 7 households) are clearly above '5' but it's not just this subset. I've wondered about having a discussion of specifics in order to clarify and share expectations (but have not really done it). One of the dimensions that particularly would be helpful is knowing when people welcome drop-in visits and other contact. I typically ignore the admonition that one should call before visiting / dropping by friends / neighbors and relatives. Fred who has borrowed neighbors vehicles and left his kid with many different neighbors on occasion (or arranged contingency plans to do so on short notice). Description of our neighborhood that needs updating: http://freenet.msp.mn.us/housing/cohousing/homewood -- Fred H. Olson fholson [at] cohousing.org Minneapolis,MN 55411 (612)588-9532 Amateur radio: WB0YQM List manager of: Cohousing-L See http://www.cohousing.org and Nbhd-tc -- Twin Cities Neighborhood issues list. See http://freenet.msp.mn.us
RE: Circumstantial Community -Relationship expectations. Rob Sandelin, August 1 1999
- Re: Circumstantial Community -Relationship expectations. RodLambert, August 10 1999
- RE: Circumstantial Community -Relationship expectations. Fred H. Olson, August 13 1999
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