Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: ROMANTICIZING COHOUSING

[Jennifer S. Stevens (jstevens]

On Thu, 21 Oct 1999, Maggi Rohde wrote:

> 
>   It's not my "lifestyle," it's my life.  It's part of my core being.  
> The same is true for my sister and her two husbands, who have been
> together for eleven years, and for countless others in the closet.
> Including, apparently, many on this list.
> 
>   Please have more respect.

Maggi hits the nail on the head here. Many of the arguments I've seen
posted, ie that poly is a "lifestyle choice" are awful similar to the old
argument that homo/bisexuality is a "lifestyle choice" and thus it's ok to
say that you don't wanna live around such types or that it's ok to
morally "disapprove" of them and discriminate. There may well be people
who justify infidelity on the basis of "polyandry" but the two sound quite
different to me (to me infidelity is being involved in other relationships
without one's partner's consent and/or knowledge. It is also known as
"serial monogomy."). Personally, I think that being committed to two or
more people would be even harder than being committed to one (and as such
demands a great deal of respect :)

And I'm not sure I'd wanna live in a cohousing community that couldn't
respect that commitment either, or can't respect different religions,
sexualities, body types, ethnic backgrounds, political beliefs, etc.

jen stevens