Personality disorders and Cohousing
From: Elizabeth Stevenson (
Date: Tue, 10 Apr 2001 20:12:01 -0600 (MDT)
I haven't seen anyone with what I would call a personality disorder "make 
it" in cohousing. Cohousing is a very rigorous way to live, second only to
income sharing communities. You have to be able to take stock of a situation
and be honest with yourself when you are wrong, as well as forgive other's
their foibles. I am twice as grown up as when I moved in, and some might say
that's not saying much!

But those who have been unwilling to admit mistakes or tolerate others' are
gone. Gone are the rigid, gone are even some of the founding members, who
have alot of drive but not patience for everyday humdrum issues. It is not
the place for the weak of spirit, or bullheaded, much less for those with
personality disorders.

Don't pussyfoot around with people who are making it impossible to have a
good group process. They will NEVER be happy in cohousing, so cut the line
while you can, before they buy a house. Stories of communities burned by
these people are a dime a dozen. Take the excellent suggestions of those who
have said you need a process for admitting and dismissing members.

Liz Stevenson
Southside Park Cohousing
Sacramento, California

> So, it's questionable whether it's in the
> best interest for people with personality disorders to join cohousing.
> Hans
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