Re: What is a family?
From: Sharon Villines (sharonsharonvillines.com)
Date: Sun, 23 Sep 2001 12:03:01 -0600 (MDT)
> "families", I was somewhat uneasy when I came to realize that by familes
> they meant "people with children".

I also get very uncomfortable when people start talking about "families" and
"parents" excluding anyone who does not have a child under the age of 16(?)
visibly in tow.

It would be much more accurate and less exclusive to say "We want greater
generational diversity".

I feel that the whole community is a family so defining set, immovable
clusters within it doesn't feel so comfortable. We all cluster and
re-cluster in various ways from hour to hour to but "family" defined as two
parents and 1.8 children is a cluster most of us are trying to get away
from.

If it is reassuring at all, we were worried that we would not have enough
children when we moved in with four all within the ages of 4-8. Some college
kids home here and again and shared custody visits, but in 43 units only 4
kids.

Well, the last unit to sell went to a single man who had adopted 3 boys
(brothers) ranging from 13-9. In 3 months we will have 3 babies (one set of
twins) with approximately 3 more hoped for. Our kids room will likely become
a baby room and we are trying to figure out how to make an older kids
outdoor play area.

Some people who were considering adopting have decided not to because the
interactions they have with the children here now has satisfied their
nurturing needs. Suddenly they don't need "their own" because the piazza and
the green are full and there is always someone who needs something.

So within the first year we have the huge family we thought we were going to
have to wait years for.

Sharon
-- 
Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
http://www.takomavillage.org





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