|Re: Re: "Managing Outbursts in Meetings" -- Linda Scott||<– Date –> <– Thread –>|
|From: Tree Bressen (treeic.org)|
|Date: Wed, 17 Apr 2002 07:23:16 -0600 (MDT)|
Hi, Linda wrote: >It is true, very >skilled facilitation might be able to capture those moments and create >healing out of them. More often, the whole group, facilitator included, >feels like a deer caught in headlights. The same non-hierarchical way our >groups are set up makes it difficult and uncomfortable, in terms of group >dynamics, for a social peer to assume authority (assuming they had the skill, >which is dubious) and try to negociate the minefield. The way i became a professional group facilitator has its basis in exactly such moments, so i want to talk briefly about my experience in case it's of use to others. I lived for over 4 years at Acorn Community in Virginia. It's a spin-off from the well-known Twin Oaks commune and egalitarianism has consistently been a strong value in both places, probably even moreso than at cohousing communities. When moments just like the ones being described here would happen occasionally at Acorn meetings, i consistently found myself stepping into the facilitator role regardless of whether i was formally supposed to be doing it at that meeting or not. An outburst would happen. Next would come the deer in the headlights phenomenon. Because i cared too much about everyone involved to watch their pain and not try to help, i would start doing reflective listening with both parties. I'd soon pause and check in with whoever the official facilitator was to see if my intervention was ok with them. They were always extremely relieved to have the help, and would encourage me to continue doing what i was doing. So i'd carry on until there was a better resolution, which usually came out of all parties feeling heard and respected. After enough experiences like this, i came to see that this was a gift i could offer to others outside my community too. So while it's true that not everyone has the skill, my experience has been that if you do have the skill, people are generally receptive and grateful, and that non-hierarchical organization is not a block to using it. And my hope is that someday, everyone really will have this skill, that we will grow to where it's an integral part of our culture and upbringing. Best wishes, --Tree ----------------------------------------------- Tree Bressen 1680 Walnut St. Eugene, OR 97403 (541) 484-1156 tree [at] ic.org _______________________________________________ Cohousing-L mailing list Cohousing-L [at] cohousing.org Unsubscribe and other info: http://www.communityforum.net/mailman/listinfo/cohousing-l
Re: Re: "Managing Outbursts in Meetings" -- Linda Scott Fred H Olson, April 16 2002
- Re: Re: "Managing Outbursts in Meetings" -- Linda Scott Tree Bressen, April 17 2002
- Re: Re: "Managing Outbursts in Meetings" -- Linda Scott Cheryl A. Charis-Graves, April 17 2002
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