|Don't discuss this in committees||<– Date –> <– Thread –>|
|From: Becky Schaller (bschallertheriver.com)|
|Date: Thu, 21 Nov 2002 12:08:02 -0700 (MST)|
I just received a private message about my message below indicating that a part of it wasn't clear. So I'd like to clarify. This sensitive issue very directly involved two households. It also directly affected numerous other households. One household wanted open communication and one did not want community or committee discussions. People in the community interpreted the information in different ways and came to different conclusions -- often times opposing conclusions. We were also asked not to discuss the issue on email and rumors were being spread. It was really very difficult to be supportive of both parties. What divided the community was not only what people thought about the particular issue, but also whether or not we should be discussing this as a community or whether we should honor the silence that one person requested. I'm sorry to be so vague and I'm sure anyone reading this must be quite curious. After several month of agonizing, we did finally agree to ask Laird Schaub to come and help us deal with this issue. He did and he was quite helpful and we're still processing. As we continue to process the experience as a community, I'd like for us to have some kind of guidelines as to how to respond in the future if someone asks the community not to discuss a particular topic. **************** We recently experienced a very sensitive issue. Out of respect for those involved, I won't specifically name or describe the issue. But it was an issue which had both a very personal and very community aspect to it. One of the parties most involved asked that this issue not be discussed in committees or at the general meeting. Because of the nature of the issue, they were going through a very very difficult time and asked that we not talk to them about this issue. Although they seem to love community, under stress, they felt they really needed their space. Some people felt that the community needed to respect this persons request. They were already going through such a very difficult time and community discussion would only add to their distress. Others felt like this was a community issue and we needed to discuss it and deal with it as well as we could. This was an issue which was dividing the community into different camps and needed to be dealt with. So my question is, Have other communities ever dealt with a similar situation? If so, how? Becky _______________________________________________ Cohousing-L mailing list Cohousing-L [at] cohousing.org Unsubscribe and other info: http://www.communityforum.net/mailman/listinfo/cohousing-l
- Re: Sharing Children, (continued)
- Re: Don't discuss this in committees Sharon Villines, December 11 2002
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