Re: RE: meat, forced vegetarianism, etc.
From: Elizabeth Stevenson (tamgoddesscomcast.net)
Date: Mon, 22 Sep 2003 10:38:06 -0600 (MDT)
That post makes lots of common sense. Thanks, TR.

The following is my perspective, after 10 years of eating with vegetarians,
vegan, fish-or-chicken-onlys and what we like to call meatatarians. In
addition, we have several people, me included, on various special diets.

Eating together is about hospitality, friendship, and community. Good
hospitality dictates that we make food that everyone can eat, within reason.
You would do no less in your own home, which is what the common house is.
We, too, have no hard and fast rules about what we cook. We have found that
rules get broken, and if we instead decide to be conscious in our choices,
rules are often unnecessary. We have a list where people sign up for meals.
On the list by each family's name, there's a space where their dietary
preferences are printed. So on every list, right by my family's name, it
says "no dairy or gluten." On the meal menu posted with each meal there are
choices at the bottom that indicate what is available. Right by "vegetarian"
the cooks can circle either "yes" "no" or "on request." The other options
are wheat-free, dairy-free and kids' food. Almost every meal has the option
of getting what you want by request. Some meals are not well suited to a
particular diet, and I often don't request to eat at these meals.

One of the reasons that NOT providing meals for every diet at every meal
works for us is that we have more frequent meals than some other groups.
While summer is pretty slow, during the school year we have an average 3
meals/week. Groups that have only one meal/week are shooting themselves in
the foot, IMO. There are then going to be high expectations for that meal,
and disappointment will be taken personally by all involved. If you have
more meals, one that isn't great for you won't be a big deal. And cooking
more meals means that you don't have to cook three separate entrees for each
meal. Each meal is easier to cook, and you can cook more.

Asking all the people who eat meat to give it up for every common meal is
unfair. I wouldn't dream of making everyone give up all their dairy for
common meals. Why should I impose my choices on everyone else? I am
unapologetic about my food choices, and resent it when vegetarians pretend
that their sensibilities are so delicate that their diet is more important
than mine. 

And I guarantee you that what people eat and what they say they eat are two
different things. Ask anyone who's been living in cohousing long enough, and
they'll tell you that the meat goes fast, and only the most dedicated
vegetarians eat the veggie option at meals. From what I've seen and read,
the ratio of omnivores to *true* vegetarians is consistently about 10:1.
It's probably higher. But for the sake of argument, it's still a good case
for providing meat on a regular basis at common meals. And having a
vegetarian option, amongst others, is good hospitality, and makes for a
happy community.

-- 
Liz Stevenson
Southside Park Cohousing
Sacramento, California
tamgoddess [at] comcast.net

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