Re: Yelling and running, was Re: [C-L]_Noise in Common House
From: Sharon Villines (sharonsharonvillines.com)
Date: Sat, 4 Oct 2003 07:52:07 -0600 (MDT)
On 10/04/2003 9:27 AM, "Mabel Liang" <mabel [at] twomeeps.com> wrote:
 
> In our group, we have a number of parents who think it is impractical to
> expect that young children (say, toddlers) will not yell and run.  I am
> personally baffled by the reasoning, but I think the general idea is that
> you can't expect children that young to understand or follow these rules.
> And the parents are unwilling to stop this behavior.  So we have no such
> rules.

This is one of my great pet peeves about some parents. It is an insult to
the intelligence of children to believe that they cannot learn that behavior
is appropriate or inappropriate in different circumstances. By the age of
one year, all our babies, four so far, have understood when it is time to be
quiet and when they should not run. Just like adults (who is an adult?),
they do forget and are not always quiet when they understand they should be,
but they are perfectly capable of understanding context by the age of one
year, many well before this. They certainly understand safety issues.

If a one year old can understand this, the older children can also. Our
children are not allowed to run or yell in the commonhouse and with the
exception of exuberant outbursts like everyone else, they don't. I think we
are up to 11 between the ages of 1 to 14 (every time a cite a figure someone
reminds me of one more).

It is important to have places where running and yelling are allowed, not
only because children have more energy than they know what to do with, but
so they understand that it is not their their behavior that is being
"squashed" but the place in which they exercise it.

Indoor and outdoor voices and behavior is one good way to make the
distinction.

And why are only the parents making the rules about how members of the
community will behave? Anyone running up and downstairs is a liability risk,
particularly when it is several people pushing and shoving each other. Noise
pollution is noise pollution -- do these parents keep their children at home
when they yell?

Get a grip!

Sharon
-- 
Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
http://www.takomavillage.org

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