|RE: Process Workshop Recommendations?||<– Date –> <– Thread –>|
|From: TR Ruddick (truddickearthlink.net)|
|Date: Wed, 5 Nov 2003 10:26:14 -0700 (MST)|
> Date: Wed, 05 Nov 2003 06:34:45 -0700 > From: Becky Schaller <beckys [at] sonoracohousing.com> > Subject: [C-L]_Process Workshop Recommendations? > > Hi Sharon, thanks for your response. I agree that how people feel about > each other is vastly more important than any communication skills that > might be learned in a workshop. However, I have seen minor conflicts > get escalated because of poor process.... I remember one member who was quite upset in a meeting > saying, "I feel attacked by what Georgia said." No one responded to > that. After thinking about that, I now remember that in the book on > Nonviolent Communication, I read that "attacked" is not a feeling word. > It's an interpretation.... > So, I'd like to repeat my request. If anyone has recommendations of > types of process workshops that have been helpful in your community, > would you please let me know. > Sharon V replied: > > > COMMUNICATION SKILLS > > Research on team functioning consistently shows that in the long term > how people feel about each other and how well they function is related > to how well they do their jobs -- content, not process. The emphasis on > communication as "skills" can be very artificial and distract from real > issues -- getting the job done. When I teach group communication, I offer my students a choice. "You will have a committee of people who will decide how to treat your brain tumor. Do you want the committee to be made up entirely of neurosurgeons, or of communication professors? Think about it now...those brain surgeons are fairly haughty types and they probably won't communicate well!" I'd have to say that it's a both-and rather than an either-or situation. People who descend into name-calling are going to make work difficult; peoeple who don't know how to address an issue are also going to make work difficult. But there are dozens of books out there that deal with process. Pick up any small-group communication textbook, or even a good general basic communication course text, and you can find the old "reflective pattern for problem solving" (John Dewey), which is the group process that works well across all types of group and problem (others, like nominal group technique or single-issue process, are more useful for certain types of group or problem, but terrible for others). If group members can't figure it out from the book, odds are that a workshop won't make them change process either (though it may make them feel good, which is a valid goal). Experience shows again and again that people communicate in unconcious, habitual, reflexive ways. If your communication neurons are wired to interpret any disagreement as a personal attack, to use bellowing and namecalling as a tool of persuasion, or to pull a group off onto tangents because your own mind works in that unfocused way, it will take several months of concentrated effort to suppress the old bad communication habits and substitute new, better ones. That's the cold, hard fact; that's the way people learn to change behaviors. BTW, I logged into half.com and looked for John Chaffee; there are copies of all of his books there for under $3.00 (plus shipping). I usually just borrow from the library--it's more environmental. TR Ruddick Dayton Cohousing _______________________________________________ Cohousing-L mailing list Cohousing-L [at] cohousing.org Unsubscribe and other info: http://www.cohousing.org/cohousing-L
Process Workshop Recommendations? Becky Schaller, November 5 2003
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