Re: Values in community, was sexuality
From: ken (gebserspeakeasy.net)
Date: Fri, 17 Mar 2006 02:32:06 -0800 (PST)
Amy Gahran wrote:
> This has been a very interesting discussion and I appreciate everyone's
> views.
> 
> For me, since my husband and I are polyamorous and since our partners are
> integral to our lives to the extent that we consider them family, it would
> be an important value to me to be fairly certain that, say, it wouldn't be a
> problem for my husband to invite his partner to a community dinner, be seen
> with his arm around her, give her a hug and a kiss, etc. I would want her to
> feel as welcome by the community on those occasions as family members for
> anyone else in the community.
> 
> So I guess, since there's an inevitable dissonance between stated and
> unstated community values or norms, and since every community is different,
> I would probably want to begin my search for a community in those
> communities where poly people already live and are "out" to their neighbors.
> Then I'd spend some time talking to the poly folks and others in the
> community about their thoughts and feelings on the issue...  In addition to
> checking out the community's facilities, finances, philosophy, etc., of
> course!
> 
> I don't expect everyone in the world to be open-minded about polyamory, but
> I think in a situation as interdependent as cohousing that would become a
> more important consideration, at least for me.
> 
> Thanks,
> 
> - Amy Gahran

Amy,

I'd be interested if you find such places.  Here in Cleveland there's a
handful of us interested in some kind of IC, cohousing being the most
popular idea.  I set up <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ic-neo/> for
discussions, but not a lot of people are making full use of it.  Most
seem to be just listening to what others have to say.  As one
characteristic among many, I listed this group in icdb.org as open and
welcoming of polyamory and polyfidelity, although this shouldn't be
considered our primary reason for our being, but just one aspect.


-- 
"This world ain't big enough for the both of us,"
said the big noema to the little noema.


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