|Re: advice on resolving conflicts||<– Date –> <– Thread –>|
|From: sharon (sharonsharonvillines.com)|
|Date: Thu, 4 Mar 2010 06:37:33 -0800 (PST)|
On Thu, 4 Mar 2010 04:16:57 -0800 (PST), Mark Harfenist <markharf [at] yahoo.com> wrote: > > The tendency is for the same or similar problems to arise again and again > in different forms, often embodied in different people, since they are > expressions of systematic issues, human nature, or random probability. In > other words, even if the person in question leaves the community, someone > else will mysteriously step forward to play the same role. Years ago, before I even heard of systems theory, I met a woman who was in charge of a non-profit program related to mental health. She said they had come to the conclusion that this was true and had stopped either firing people or doing individual counseling when there was tension or perceived inadequacy. It had calmed down the office and taught everyone to deal with conflicts as systems, not individual personality issues. I'm not trying to trivialize the problem that first raised this thread, but it triggers a memory of another story. In one of my dentist's offices, they designated one person to be responsible for all the problems that week. If it was Mary's week, she wsa responsible for all the empty tissue boxes, missing equipment, telephones going out, the weather, cranky patients, late appointments, etc. It worked brilliantly. It gave everyone the opportunity to let off steam, while at the same time making complaining funny. It allowed people to raise irritations in a non-threatening way because the person they were raising them to rarely had anything to do with them. And people could see that one can find irritations anywhere because they would find irritations in order to complain and set off laughter again. Sharon ==== Sharon Villines Takoma Village Cohousing
- Advice on resolving conflicts Fred H Olson, February 23 2010
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