Re: community communications: how to do it
From: Sharon Villines (sharonsharonvillines.com)
Date: Wed, 3 Nov 2010 12:36:10 -0700 (PDT)
On 2 Nov 2010, at 4:29 PM, Ellen Keyne Seebacher wrote:

> Wow.  That would so not work at Mosaic Commons, where we have members
> who are world travelers and some, like me, who are lucky to get to the
> Common House once or twice a week.

We also have all the online calendars, website, wikis, etc., but transferring 
the basic schedule to one white board that is a visible reminder is a godsend. 
Few of us sign on everyday to remind ourselves of a meeting.

One reason I chose to live in an attached dwelling design and not a lot 
development model, was so everyone would be close to the CH. Some do park on 
the street on the other end but except for those who are traveling it would be 
unusual for someone not to be in the CH for mail or whatever on a regular 
basis. The huge majority is everyday.

> None of the face-to-face-is-better folks
> seemed eager to hammer out a single meeting time that would
> accommodate everyone -- so that project's been sitting on a back
> burner for months.  I believe we could have settled the whole thing 
> via email in a week or two. :(

I am of the opinion that insisting on face-to-face is an approved method for 
ensuring that nothing ever gets said or done. It's an arm's length tactic, not 
the touchy-feely tactic that it is characterized as.

> Also, this fall the community decided that every one of our lists
> should have its Reply-To: settings changed to reply to the poster,
> rather than the list.  While this has cut down on random "me too!" and
> "thanks" clutter (and meal signups sent to everyone, instead of the
> chef), it's also cut down significantly on group discussion.

I once moderated 35 lists and still moderate quite a few. Replies to sender 
kill discussion and sterilize lists faster than any other factor. It guarantees 
that the list will become an announcements only list except for those who are 
committed to inclusive discussions. Topics just die.

One reason for this is that many people are listeners. They don't believe they 
have anything to say or are shy about saying it. Only about 10% of the people 
ever post. It will be higher in a close group like cohousing or a working team 
list but still much, much lower than those of us who write easily would expect.

If replies go to the poster, those people are automatically eliminated. They 
can't listen. They become more focused away from the list or are never brought 
into it.

I do not find it to be true that the people who don't like email, make up for 
it by having lots of face-to-face meetings with lots of people. I find that 
they communicate with the same small number of people I communicate with — only 
more often because they are extroverts. But they are not out knocking on doors 
to be sure they include everyone. And they are not having more heart to heart 
talks.

Some of the most personal and intimately revealing conversations and 
relationships I've had with people were on email. It isn't the medium. It's the 
message masquerading as the medium.

Sharon
----
Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
http://www.takomavillage.org





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