|. Re: Consensus, Majority Vote, "Blocks"||<– Date –> <– Thread –>|
|From: R.N. Johnson (cohorandayahoo.com)|
|Date: Tue, 18 Oct 2011 17:08:47 -0700 (PDT)|
Sometimes it is appropriate that someone move on, and it can be sometimes done while continuing good relations. We had a member who had over committed financially- putting too much money into the house. She became very anxious about finances and began speaking against virtually every expenditure, large and small. We explored solutions, up to and including other people putting more money down so she could take money out to put back into savings (we are a tenancy in common and are all on one loan, making this possible). She eventually decided to move out, not in anger, but with the realization that this was not right for her, and what she wanted might not be healthy for the group. We still hear from her and see her now and then. If you have a member who is frivolously blocking, or practicing consensus extortion "I will block X unless you change Y and Z to suit me" or who is consistently unable to see the rest of the community's point of view and you have done your best to resolve any underlying issues and concerns, I think the good of the rest of the community should carry more weight in this situation. Ideally, you will be able to find the root of the problem, but in real life that does not always happen. If you are an ardent proponent of a particular diet and you will not be happy until you have converted or coerced the 35 others in your group to follow your preferred dietary path, there's a problem. If you need to have input into every decision, and don't have the time to participate in all those decisions, your will either drive your fellow members out of their skulls or out of the community, or you will eventually leave. Some people cannot imagine that others do not think as they do, or cannot see the possibility of someone disagreeing with them who understands their objections. We should work very hard to incorporate dissenting views to come to full consensus, but with some people it is not possible unless you always do what they want.
- . Re: Consensus, Majority Vote, "Blocks" R.N. Johnson, October 18 2011
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