Re: Types of conflict in cohousing -- did I miss any?
From: Jerry McIntire (
Date: Sat, 23 Jan 2016 11:26:30 -0800 (PST)
Mary, I look forward to seeing your workbook when it is done. Family
conflicts are fresh in my mind from a recent vacation. They frustrate me

On Jan 23, 2016 7:50 AM, "R Philip Dowds" <rpdowds [at]> wrote:

> This is an important distinction.  Many “conflicts" are trivial and
> idiosyncratic: unique communication errors, speculation in a context of
> missing information, random personal preferences or phobias, and so on.
> But when people are unable to agree on basic facts, or on a credible
> problem description, or on list of plausible alternative solutions — the
> underlying causes are often repressed and seemingly unmentionable anger,
> resentment, competition, or disappointment.  Debating the “facts” is
> utterly pointless when the underlying causes remain denied and
> undiscussable.
> Thanks,
> Philip Dowds
> Cornerstone Village Cohousing
> Cambridge, MA
> > On Jan 22, 2016, at 12:45 PM, Mary Baker, Solid Communications <
> mary [at]> wrote:
> >
> > Also, maybe I should clarify that this is a workbook about handling real
> conflict—burning anger, repressed resentment, explosions, forms of adult
> bullying, broken relationships.
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