Re: co-care agreements?
From: Cohousing (cohousingmindspring.com)
Date: Fri, 27 Jan 2017 09:09:42 -0800 (PST)
THANK YOU, LIZ!  Great ideas we will incorporate. In the “old days” when there 
were no “old folks homes” or “rest homes” (forerunners to nursing homes) 
families kept their own until they died. This is the ideal. Stay in the family. 
Avoid medical intervention to prolong life at the expense of quality of life. 
Every human being should read Being Mortal by Atul Gawande. 

Kayelily
Raleigh-cohousing.com <http://raleigh-cohousing.com/> 




> On Jan 27, 2017, at 11:40 AM, Liz Ryan Cole <lizryancole [at] me.com> wrote:
> 
> 
> and there is more to consider… what if we planned KNOWING that most of us 
> will need help, especially as we age.  Do we have a “grandmother’s house”? 
> use au pairs who help both young families and older ones, create monthly fees 
>  that are high enough to pay ourselves (and others) to do some of the 
> necessary work - which means that even when someone can’t cook once a week, 
> or garden, etc. that either someone else in the community will be paid to do 
> it, or we can provide a living wage to a member of our larger community (and 
> thus avoid some of the inward focus that some communities get stuck with).
> 
> liz
> 
> 
> Liz Ryan Cole
> lizryancole [at] me.com
> Pinnacle Cohousing at Loch Lyme Lodge
> Lyme, NH
> Home 802.785.4124
> Work (Vermont Law School) 802.831.1240
> Mobile 802.274.1511
> 
> where Lyme’s Planning Board continues to argue that single family homes on 
> large lots are the only way for people to live (in Lyme at least) and we push 
> back.  :)
> 
> I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a 
> desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.”
> ― E.B. White
> 
> 
> On Jan 27, 2017, at 11:12 AM, Eris Weaver <eris [at] erisweaver.info> wrote:
> 
> 
> Muriel wrote:
>>> This topic is bringing up an unresolved issue for me about the goal of
>>> helping cohousers age in place. Does it make sense to plan on staying
>>> longer in your home, with whatever kind of assistance, past the point when
>>> you can "do" cohousing except in a social sense, receiving visits and
>>> perhaps getting some kinds of assistance from your neighbors that you can't
>>> reciprocate? How many such residents can a community sustain?
> 
> That last sentence is the key question: How many non-working members can a 
> given community sustain in the long term? This is partially a function of 
> community size - my community of 30 households can hold more than a community 
> of 12 - but lots of other factors come into play.
> 
> I've often discouraged potential cohousers who seem too focused on all the 
> things they think they will GET from cohousing but don't seem to realize that 
> they will also be expected to GIVE. Similarly, as our communities age, we 
> can't assume that turnover will take care of our needs - we can't just expect 
> that we'll naturally attract loads of younger, more energetic new neighbors 
> who will be thrilled to pick up all the work that we can't do 
> anymore...especially when they don't have the longterm relationships the 
> previous members do.
> 
> Some time ago Laird Schaub wrote an essay about his community, Sandhill, 
> eventually deciding not to add anymore new members over a certain age, as 
> they were becoming too "top heavy" demographically. They just coulnd't for 
> the longterm continue to do the physical work that they do with the bodies 
> available. (Sandhill is an income-sharing agricultural commune, very 
> different than cohousing, but the idea still applies - especially in 
> communities with  strong "we must DIY everything!" sentiment.)
> 
> We can all handle a small number of folks being "out" at a time - right now 
> one of my neighbors, who broke her leg and lives in an upstairs unit she 
> cannot now access, is living in the common house guest room and folks are 
> helping her out while she recovers. But if there were FOUR  folks needing 
> that level of assistance at the same time, I think compassion fatigue and 
> just logistical issues would prevent us from doing it well.
> 
> Eris
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