Re: Definition of Bullying
From: Sharon Villines (
Date: Thu, 17 May 2018 09:53:19 -0700 (PDT)
> On May 17, 2018, at 9:22 AM, Alan O via Cohousing-L <cohousing-l [at] 
>> wrote:
> Bullies / violence perpetrators are adept victim-blamers and skillful at 
> turning conflicts around by victimizing themselves.

My concern in the discussion is that the use of the word “violence" describes 
physical and extreme emotional abuse, but many if not most instances of 
bullying are much more subtle. The teacher who repeatedly puts a student down, 
the board that doesn’t listen to women, the verbal child who twists words.

When we go to extreme language we miss the less extreme instances. I have a 
similar fear with “sexual abuse.” When everything becomes an imprisonable 
offense, the offenses are less likely to be reported. It isn’t the adult’s 
actions that destroyed the family, or the child’s reporting it. It’s the 
reaction of society.

Except that no one has yet found a Republican or at least a conservative one, 
efforts to pick perfect people haven’t made cohousing perfect — nor should 
they. Remember diversity? Do we just want to keep “them” out or do we want to 
work with it.

Sharon Villines
If brown, black, yellow, and red, are derogatory, why isn’t white?

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