Re: help with conflict resolution | <– Date –> <– Thread –> |
From: Elizabeth Magill (pastorlizm![]() |
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Date: Wed, 24 Apr 2019 17:02:06 -0700 (PDT) |
Hey Susan!! I'd love if you could send me more details (off-list at pastorlizM [at] gmail.com) about what exactly is the aggression and who are the people who tried to arrange the meetings. It is a great example for my workshop on conflict resolution at the cohousing conference. If you are willing I will change the details so it is an anonymous case study. The first question I would ask about this is who wants this solved? If you have a community support or other conflict focused team, I would begin by working with the person who wants this solved. What are things they can do, or get help to do, that don't involve meeting with the other person? At Mosaic Commons cohousing all members have signed an "agree to try to resolve conflict" statement, but that doesn't mean that everyone actually does that. (And like most cohousing communities, we don't have (m)any people willing to enforce consequences for not following agreements.) So some of conflict resolution is about people who are unhappy with another person figuring out what they want to do differently for themselves. Because when it comes down to it, the only person you can change is yourself. The team might also look at how the conversations looking for a meeting have gone--what was the actual dialogue? What was the person actually saying no to? I'd need a lot more detail to know what to do next but for example, sometimes folk feel like the purpose of the meeting is to apologize. If they don't want to apologize why meet? If it is possible to have a meeting where one person isn't presumed to be "the guilty party" then the chance of meeting is much higher. Liz Mosaic-Commons Cohousing Berlin, MA On Wed, Apr 24, 2019 at 7:44 PM Susan Rohrbach via Cohousing-L <cohousing-l [at] cohousing.org> wrote: > > Our cohousing community in tucson is having a problem with a resident acting > aggressively toward another resident. Several people have tried to arrange > meetings with the two parties to see if there is a way to come to some > resolution. However, the person who acted aggressively does not feel any > responsibility and has refused to attend any meeting or apologize in any way. > This has led to a very uncomfortable situation and any advice or resources > would be most welcome. > Thank youSusan Rohrbach > _________________________________________________________________ > Cohousing-L mailing list -- Unsubscribe, archives and other info at: > http://L.cohousing.org/info > > > -- -Liz (The Rev. Dr.) Elizabeth Mae Magill Pastor, Ashburnham Community Church Minister to the Affiliates, Ecclesia Ministries www.ecclesiaministriesmission.org www.mosaic-commons.org 508-450-0431
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help with conflict resolution Susan Rohrbach, April 24 2019
- Re: help with conflict resolution Elizabeth Magill, April 24 2019
- Re: help with conflict resolution Sharon Villines, April 24 2019
- Re: Help with Conflict Resolution Karen Gimnig, April 25 2019
- Re: Help with Conflict Resolution David Heimann, April 26 2019
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