Re: On child proofing the CH with locks on drawer and cupboards
From: Sharon Villines (
Date: Wed, 26 Jun 2019 10:57:33 -0700 (PDT)
> On Jun 26, 2019, at 12:23 PM, Diana Carroll <dianaecarroll [at]> 
> wrote:

> However, your argument for that is very problematic, and seems to rest on the 
> idea that the worst that can happen with a kid getting into a drawer they 
> shouldn't is dumping some tea or drawing with markers.  The worst that can 
> happen is that the kid dies.

What would they die of?

> You also assume that kids will naturally learn not to do something from ONE 
> negative (non-death) experience. Sometimes that's the case and sometimes it 
> isn’t.

If it isn’t, then you deal with that. In a public space children are normally 
much more observant than at home with parents. When kids are at my house, they 
are wonderfully behaved (normally) because I’m not their parent whom they have 
learned to get around.

> And you assume that having adults express displeasure with them counts as 
> negative enough to learn not to do it.  That is not only often wrong, it is 
> also not inline with the actual childhood development psychology.

????? Never express displeasure? Children need to know how other people feel.

>  With that theory, no kid would ever do a bad thing twice...which, you 
> know...isn't how kids work.

Amazingly, it often is. But they aren’t given a chance. I have a one finger 
rule that my mother developed for a too curious brother. They can touch 
anything they want with one finger.  I don’t put away figurines, paper flowers, 
etc. (Recently 2 sixteen year olds came back to reminisce and went around the 
apartment identifying all the one-finger things. Very funny.)

Some are incorrigible and you have to adjust. We had one little boy like that 
who moved away recently. He was very physical and had no fear. But his parents 
were fully aware and he was almost never out of eyesight.

> And you mention special needs kids...that's a pretty broad term.  If you are 
> arguing with a parent in your community about what their kid needs, who are 
> you to decide whether they are "special needs" or not? 

I’m  using it in a broad sense of the example above. If there is a child in the 
community who can’t be trusted  to observe the norms or isn’t capable, then 
more prevention may be required.

We do have a situation since we are in a city that children under 6-7 are 
almost never in the CH alone.

Not arguing, just asking and clarifying.

Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC

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