|Re: Hiring outside facilitators/professionals||<– Date –> <– Thread –>|
|From: R Philip Dowds (rphilipdowdsme.com)|
|Date: Sun, 18 Oct 2020 04:06:05 -0700 (PDT)|
“Externally”, over the 13+ years I’ve lived here, we’ve had a variety of “outside” facilitators and trainers come and go. I usually attend their events, and their success has definitely been a mixed bag. In most cases, to me anyway, success or failure seems more related to the dynamics of the specific controversy than to the skill of the facilitator. “Internally”, we do maintain a Conflict Administration Team (CAT). The volunteers on this Team are well-intentioned and competent. But dealing with interpersonal conflict is just plain painful, and neither CAT volunteers nor conflicted residents are eager to meet, explore and resolve. Some or much of our membership seems to believe that preservation of cordial relationships benefits from sweeping conflicts under the rug. Sometimes, some parties in conflict simply refuse to be available for conflict resolution. Let’s keep clear the distinction between disagreements and conflicts. All communities have disagreements, usually frequently: Some people think common meals should always be vegetarian, and others do not agree. The normal processes of dialog and consensus will deliver an answer or compromise — after which, life goes on, and everyone is still friends. No special facilitation needed. Conflicts, on the other hand, have an emotional charge, put personal identity and social standing at risk, and evolve into a dynamic where the contestants see each other as “enemies” who must be “defeated”. I think most cohousing has a lot of trouble dealing with real conflict. I know Cornerstone does. Special facilitation may or may not work. Be slow to blame the facilitator. Thanks, Philip Dowds Cornerstone Cohousing Cambridge, MA > On Oct 15, 2020, at 2:44 PM, Therese Kunzi-Clark <studiotkc [at] gmail.com> > wrote: > > I would like to get some information on how other Cohousing Communities > deal with difficult issues or conflicts that need to be discussed with the > whole community. > > 1. Do you deal with it internally or do you hire an outside > facilitator/professional. > > 2.How often and for what kind of issues or help do you hire outside > facilitators? > > 3. If you deal with it internally, can you recommend "best practices" > > Thank you for your input. > > Therese Kunzi-Clark > > Winslow Cohousing > _________________________________________________________________ > Cohousing-L mailing list -- Unsubscribe, archives and other info at: > http://L.cohousing.org/info > > >
- Hiring outside facilitators/professionals Therese Kunzi-Clark, October 15 2020
Re: Hiring outside facilitators/professionals fergyb2, October 18 2020
- Re: Hiring outside facilitators/professionals Sharon Villines, October 18 2020
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