Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Community Cemetery

[Cher Stuewe-Portnoff (cherworks01]

We lived for a while in an intentional community where that possibility was
considered. In our 30s-40s, we were supporters. Now with adult children
whose feelings count, we aren't so sure for ourselves. We are looking for a
cohousing home, so this was a good question to think about. Would we buy in
a community that had this option/practice? It wouldn't put us off.

Would we buy a house that we knew had had a recent death in it? What if s/he
were buried just up the pedway? We think so, but one's body/soul response to
this kind of thing can be very, very hard to foretell.

A prior owner had died in one of our homes we loved best -- an older owner,
twice removed from us. Our un-evolved reaction was to put it out of mind,
and it worked for us. For another house in our neighborhood, though, the
circumstances of an occupant's death were unpleasant (fire). Even with an
interval before marketing and completely renovated, that house stayed unsold
at least for well over a year when other houses around it were going pretty
fast.

Sometimes my emotions or new information will overcome or change my values
when things become real, even decades after I think I know what I've decided
about an issue. Bottom line -- I think your pool of buyers would be somewhat
smaller, maybe not a lot. You might also attract some who will find that
feature unusual and in accord with their ideals/wishes. People will think
they know how they feel, and then some will get a surprise (in either
direction) when they step across the threshold. 

In deciding whether to take advantage of such an option, older people
usually also ask, "How will my family -- adult children, in particular --
feel?"

Good research question. That said -- this isn't a "Halloween Fool's Day"
question, is it :-)?

Cher



-----Original Message-----
From: Kibuyu [mailto:kibuyu [at] yahoo.com] 
Sent: Sunday, October 29, 2006 11:23 PM
To: Cohousing-L
Subject: [C-L]_ Community Cemetery

In our community, we're considering designating a
small part of our large open wilderness space as a
cemetery for "green burials"  i.e. where members could
be buried in simple biodegradable coffins and without
permanent markers.  Two cutting-edge concepts there -
DIY burials without middlemen, and outside of a
cemetery, yet it appears that both are legal in our
state. 

Within our community, opinion is divided. Proponents
argue that this procedure has been the norm for most
of the world since the dawn of mankind; death is the
natural end of life and we should return our remains
to the land where we live, without consuming yet more
costly resources in our passing. Opponents say uh-oh,
even if this is legal, it will have to be disclosed
when houses are sold, and what will this do to our
property values? Will it put off prospective buyers?

Now, prospective cohousing buyers are not your average
J Doe, they are people like you and me with a fair
amount of education and tolerance and receptivity to
unconventional ideas. So I'd like to ask you this
question: 

If you were about to buy a house in a new community,
and you learned that someone had a) died in that house
and b) been buried nearby, would that affect your
decision or your perceived value of the house?

I searched your archive but could only find one short
1995 thread on the subject. Has anyone out there
first-hand experience of burying neighbors in
community land, or of trying to do so?

Feel free to reply directly to me if you don't want to
clutter the listserve with responses, then I will
later post a single summary of feedback received, for
general interest.

Thanks, and happy Halloween! - David B







 
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