Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: The vision thing -- what good is it?

[Kay Argyle (Kay.Argyle]

Heaven knows what happened to the response I originally composed. I'll try
to remember some of the brilliant witty insights I came up with ... ;)

I think I could describe Wasatch Commons, at twelve years old, as a "mature"
community, although I'm not entirely sure about "basically well-functioning"
part. We keep trying. 
 
If a community has never formulated vision/mission/values statements, I
recommend it. Having a Values statement that you can show prospects or refer
to among yourselves is useful. The bigger benefit, IMO, is the discussion(s)
while coming up with it.

I note Mariana said "re-define" her community's Vision and Values
statements. Do you already have ones that people feel are no longer a good
fit or don't have buy-in? If there is dissatisfaction, I'd be inclined to
revisit them.

Four years after move-in, Wasatch Commons created Vision and Values
statements (inserted below, after my signature). It took several months,
including a weekend retreat, maybe thirty hours of community meetings,
lengthy email discussions, and half a dozen drafts (I _think_ the version
below is the final one ...).

I noticed a tendency for the Values to become a laundry list of every
imaginable virtue. Some things, however desirable ("We value world peace"),
aren't relevant to the community's mission.

After I objected to "We are a safe place emotionally" on the grounds present
tense wasn't appropriate (anger management problems, passive-aggressive
behavior, "Let's you and him fight" ...), a number of values were rephrased
into goals.

Some people kept trying to put specific actions in the Values, e.g., "We
recycle." Uh-uh. That isn't a value. Why do we recycle? Uh, to reduce how
much we send to the dump? Closer. What's the broader goal? To reduce our
environmental impact? Okay, note-taker, write that down.

The first draft put interpersonal (community) relationships first. I raised
the point that integrity in relationships starts with integrity in the self.
Trust requires trustworthiness. There were changes to accommodate me. Yet I
have doubts how many people actually grasped the concept. Whenever the
subject of strengthening the community comes up, I still hear much talk
about the need for trust, and little about dependability.

In some odd way, I think discussing the values we shared persuaded some of
our more -- er, fervent? -- members to accept that we did not share all
values, we would continue to not share all values, and that was okay.  The
pressure for everyone to be best friends and agree about everything eased.
During the first years, a couple of members would occasionally demand of
someone they disagreed with, "If you don't believe [whatever, often having
nothing to do with community], why do you live in cohousing?" After the
values discussions, when this happened other people present didn't just sit
there looking uncomfortable, they intervened: "Her reasons are her own
business, and if they differ from yours, so what?"

The Values statement is displayed on a pair of laminated posters in our
common house sitting room. Occasionally a facilitator will have a round
robin reading of the Values before a community meeting. There isn't a great
deal of explicit reference to them during community discussions. I will
confess to an inconsistency: I curl my lip over House Speaker John Boehner
wanting every bill to have a section saying what in the Constitution allows
it; on the other hand, I think our decisions might be stronger if each
included a discussion on how it upheld our values.

Reading Mariana's email, I considered whether our own Values were still
appropriate after eight years and considerable resident turnover, and tried
to imagine revising them. Utter dismay. We absolutely could not take on
another big topic like that just now, not while we were in the middle of
talking about -- values like accountability, equitability, and fairness, as
we define the details of a major new work policy. Oh.

Kay
Wasatch Commons

~~~~~~~~~~
VISION
 
We create community by sharing resources and experiences, and through our
respect and support for individuals, relationships and the Earth.
 
VALUES
 
Integrity
 
Right Conduct
Our conduct reflects our integrity.  Our actions and words respect the
personhood, property, and general well being of everyone in our community.
 
Accountability and Responsibility
Each of us, as well as all of us as a community, takes responsibility for
our actions and their consequences, and for our contributions to the
community.
 
Relationships
 
Trust and Honesty
We build trust through dependability and through openness and honesty,
tempered by sensitivity and strengthened by courage.
 
Respect
We respect each other's freedom of lifestyle and personal privacy.  We trust
members to make choices that do not infringe on the safety or freedom of any
other member or the community as a whole. 
 
Diversity and Commonality
We recognize and seek deeper understanding of the full range of our
commonality and diversity.  We honor expressions of both. 
 
Acceptance
We value friendship and friendliness.  We foster a sense of belonging and
extended family through acceptance and appreciation of each community
member.
 
Intergenerational Relationships
As a community, we recognize varied contributions from members of different
ages; we value all stages of human development and encourage supportive,
mutually beneficial relationships between generations.  
 
Support, Growth, and Reconciliation
We welcome and support personal growth in ourselves and in others.  We
recognize that reconciliation enhances the health and well being of the
entire community, and encourage community and individual efforts to embrace
healing and reconciliation.
 
Sharing Knowledge and Appreciation
We are enriched by the knowledge and human resources brought by each
individual to our community, and we encourage members to share their unique
talents and abilities with the community. We value expressions of
acknowledgment and appreciation of diverse community contributions.
 
Creating Community 
 
Cooperation 
Through tolerance, generosity, sharing, and compassion, we live
cooperatively.  We recognize that working, playing and celebrating together
are essential to building relationships.  When appropriate, we place the
interests of the community ahead of our own self-interests.  
 
Commitment
We are committed to our vision. We recognize that part of this commitment to
one another is our willingness to work through conflict as it arises.
Creating community is a dynamic process and so we remain flexible to change.
 
Safety
We work to make our community a safe place - emotionally, physically, and
spiritually-and to ensure the safety of each individual within our
community.  We collectively take responsibility for community safety.  In
the event that any community member's safety is breached, we act swiftly to
resolve the situation and to restore security.
 
Equality and Fairness 
We make decisions through consensus and depend on each member's voice and
participation. We value each member of the community individually and treat
each other with fairness. We share tasks and benefits in a fair and
equitable way. 
 
Extended Family (Children in the Community)
We value raising children in an open, nurturing, safe and celebratory
environment.  As vital members of the community, kids grow into the respect
and responsibility modeled to them. We honor the work of parenting and
support parents in the community.  We also honor those members who have
raised children or who choose not to raise children.  Kids, like all members
of the community, treat others with compassion and respect boundaries of
privacy and noise levels.
 
Balance
We value balance in our community life: between group and individual,
between building for tomorrow and enjoyment of today, between hard work and
celebration.  
 
Transitions and Milestones
We honor and celebrate individual and community landmarks and achievements
such as birth, marriage, anniversaries, birthdays, and graduations.  We
support individuals through life's transitions and milestones, including
grief, loss, illness, divorce, and death.
 
Extended Community  
We value fostering and maintaining relationships with Wasatch Commons'
immediate neighbors, the larger Glendale and Salt Lake communities, and
beyond.  
 
 
Harmony with the Earth
 
Sustainability
As stewards or as strands in a web, we recognize our interdependence with
the Earth and live in conscious gratitude.  We work to soften our impact on
the Earth through various methods of conservation.  We remain mindful that
our choices affect other beings and systems.
 
Beauty
We are committed to the synergy of aesthetic elegance and environmental
harmony, both in the ways we live and in how we arrange and care for our
physical environment.