Re: New diversity statement
From: carol collier (
Date: Tue, 27 Sep 2016 11:16:50 -0700 (PDT)
 blockquote, div.yahoo_quoted { margin-left: 0 !important; border-left:1px 
#715FFA solid !important; padding-left:1ex !important; background-color:white 
!important; }  I left this conversation long ago because it is typical. You 
have a lot of people us what we think or feel based on some alleged 
interaction, but the very people living the life are dismissed. 

Sent from Yahoo Mail for iPhone

On Tuesday, September 27, 2016, 11:51 AM, Crystal Farmer <crystalbyrdfarmer 
[at]> wrote:

It's fine to presume that the majority of black people don't want to live
in cohousing, but you have at least two black people on this mailing list
that say they do. We are also suggesting ways to make minorities more
comfortable with learning about and living in cohousing. Are you going to
discount those views because it takes too much work?

People of all races come by our tables at events and listen to my spiel
about cohousing. It takes less than a minute. When they say, "That's a
great idea!" I invite them to learn more. I don't say, "Well you probably
already have a supportive community so you don't need us."

It is very typical for black people to be told what their experience is
instead of others listening to them.

Crystal Farmer
Charlotte Cohousing Community

Based on my experience managing outreach for a forming community in the DC
area, I've come to the conclusion that cohousers may want diversity, but
"minorities" (for lack of a better umbrella term) don't necessarily want
more community. For starters, they're more likely to either stay close to
home and family or bring family with them if they move. Either way, they'll
also be deeply involved in cultural and/or religious organizations.

For example, your typical home-buying African American female in the DC
area will have a demanding job, will have extended family in the area (or
maybe in southern VA or NC, where she will visit often), will be very
active in a church, and will also be involved with her college sorority. Is
she really going to be looking for another set of commitments and
activities when she comes home from a long day at work? Especially
involving a bunch of earnest liberals trying to excise their white guilt?

White people are the ones who leave their families and move cross-country
all by themselves and find themselves rootless and lonely and seeking

Of course there will be exceptions to everything I've said, and maybe I'm
completely wrong, but I spent way too much time trying to explain cohousing
to people who were clearly thinking "Why on earth would I want to get
involved in something like that?" Then I started marketing to the LGBTQ
community and got a much better reception.

Katie Henry
Cohousing-L mailing list -- Unsubscribe, archives and other info at:


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