Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: co-care agreements?

[Sharon Villines (sharon]

One of the things we have done as a practice, not a policy, is that the person 
chooses a spokesperson who can be contacted for questions and who knows what a 
person needs. 

This has worked very well for illnesses longer than a week or so. It relieves 
the sick person from having to answer questions over and over, and for 
residents to be informed and respect privacy.

Sharon

> On Jan 26, 2017, at 2:36 PM, Eris Weaver <eris [at] erisweaver.info> wrote:
> 
> 
> Muriel Kranowski wrote:
> 
>>> My takeaway was that, at least in the abstract, we're willing to provide
> 
>>> and to accept various kinds of concrete shortish-term help and some
> 
>>> medium-term help, but most people didn't want to give or accept very
> 
>>> personal or quasi-medical care or to make open-ended commitments except
> of
> 
>>> a trivial kind. 
> 
> 
> 
> Here's another thing that gets left out of these conversations.
> 
> 
> 
> While we have community-wide agreements and expectations, we also have
> individual relationships with each other. Some of my neighbors are like
> family to me; some I wouldn't necessarily choose as friends but we have
> cordial working relationships; I have ongoing low-level conflict with one.
> Most of us are going to be willing to invest far more time and effort - and
> of a more intimate nature - helping those with whom we have deeper
> relationships. (I was willing to give B an occasional ride to the doctor; I
> spent time in the hospital spoonfeeding A.) We also differ in our
> willingness to receive certain kinds of help (W did NOT want any community
> member doing ANY personal care at all). How much people are willing & able
> to help others also depends upon their own burdens at the time - I have less
> energy to help others when my wife is recovering from surgery.
> 
> 
> 
> Any community-wide agreements made about all this are necessarily going to
> be abstract and somewhat vague. It's still useful to have the conversation,
> but be wary of making assumptions that because we're in community we're
> going to be able to take care of everyone's every need, or that people will
> be cared for equally. 
> 
> ********************************************
> 
> Eris Weaver, FrogSong Cohousing (Cotati, CA)
> 
> Graphic Facilitator & Group Process Consultant
> 
> eris [at] erisweaver.info . 707-338-8589 . http://www.erisweaver.info
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
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