Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Question about Consent Governance

[Karen Gimnig (gimnig]

I agree with Sharon that rigid timelines for decision making rarely serve
the long term health and happiness of a community, for all the reasons she
said.

I would add, that the process she describes where communities come to
shared understanding of the issues and feelings around the topic and have
time to shift toward a more shared view of best action is really
important.  I also believe that there are processes and practices that can
help that happen sooner.

Ironically, these are largely practices that intentionally slow things down
on the front end.  Take time to deeply listen and invite sharing in a
meeting where no decision is anticipated. (You may notice there that I
didn't say "take time to share" - that part comes so naturally to us, it
doesn't need our focus.) Adopt facilitation practices that promote balanced
sharing - meaning everyone not only has a theoretical opportunity to speak,
but that in fact, everyone mostly does speak and for about the same amount
of time, at least when balanced over time. Pay attention to make sure that
everyone is feeling heard - which is a different thing than being allotted
a time to speak.

Imago Relationships facilitation does this kind of work better than
anything else I've seen.  Unfortunately there isn't a lot of literature
about it yet, but feel free to reach out to me if you'd like to know more.

In Community,
Karen Gimnig
Professional Facilitator
678-705-9007, www.imago4coho.net
"The slower way to get where you want to be sooner."