Cohousing-L Mailing List: RE: burnout

[Rob Sandelin (robsan]

 Judy  BAXTER%EPIHUB [at] VX.CIS.UMN.EDU wrote:


>While we are on the subject of "does cohousing make life easier", I'd 
like any
>ideas on dealing with *burnout* during the development process...
> Any ideas on how to help get through the next year?
> I'm also worried that as people get ready to move and sell their 
houses, we'll have
even less energy available.

1. Throw a couple of parties with one rule: No shop talk! Have some fun 
once in awhile.  If all you get together for is "business" it gets 
tedious.  Have an April Fool party and dress up like fools, drink and 
dance! (Try and limit shop talk - you won't be able to stop it all together)

2. Recognize the limits and work with them.  Not everything on the list 
is priority #1.  Let the lower priority things slip.

3. Delegate.  Let architects, professionals, or even (gasp!) prosective 
members carry a chunk of the load. From what I have heard, over and 
over again, Cohousing groups tend to think they have to, or want to 
make, every little decision.  Let an individual or a small group own 
the entire decision cycle for some of the details. It really doesn't 
matter if the commonhouse tile is beige instead of green - don't waste 
group time trying to make that level of decision.

4. Create a roadmap of what you have to do.  Make a giant list of 
yellow sticky notes with a task on each one and place them on a large 
wall, in the order they have to occur.  Then look for energy "humps", 
places where you will need a bunch of energy applied. Then you can 
"pysch yourselves up" for those humps.

5.  Don't let the should haves worry you. "We should have done this, we 
should be doing that..."

6. Remember that the miracle of the dancing bear is not how well it 
dances, but that it dances at all. Pat yourself on the back at each 
meeting collectively and individually.  Marvel at your accomplishments 
so far and recognize the work each other is doing in a positive way. 
Sometimes all a person needs to get energized is a thank you.