Cohousing-L Mailing List: RE: Cohousing for a college?

[Rob Sandelin (robsan]

I have said this so much people are sick of hearing it but I will say 
it yet again.  All my experience with communities (not just cohousing) 
leads me to believe that community does not come from buildings, 
pathways, or how social the mailbox is, community comes from the 
relationship of the people and their commitment to that relationship

Every example Chuck gave in his closing address about community had 
NOTHING to do with architecture.  I have visited socially designed 
communities which have great architure for community and very little 
community happening and places with very poor site design for community 
who are thriving as a community (Sharingwood would qualify in this 
description).

If you want to build community you need to spend time together building 
relationships. Share together your hopes, your dreams, your fears, your 
history in an intimate setting. Establish ways to do things where you 
work together on cooperative projects and goals.  Reach out and help 
each other - go the extra mile to do things for each other, to give 
things and service to each other - to support each other when you are 
down.  Take the responsibility for yourself, acknowledge your affects, 
admit your mistakes, be honest with each other about the hurts and 
always express the joy and appreciation.  These are ways community is 
built.  Without this, cohousing is just architecture and too many 
people don't seem to understand this.

Rob Sandelin
Sharingwood