Cohousing-L Mailing List: RE: Xmas trees in Cohousing

[Jean Pfleiderer (pfleiderer_j]

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>Date: Mon, 13 Feb 95 14:35 CST
>From: "kolre001 [at] maroon.tc.umn.edu" <kolre001 [at] maroon.tc.umn.edu>
>Subject: RE: Xmas trees in Cohousing
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>Rebecca's points about Xmas trees in cohousing are excellent.
>
>Perhaps it is just that I live in the midwest where the population is 
>overwhelmingly homogenous -- white and Christian -- but I have yet to 
>encounter a cohousing group that even entertained the question of whether 
>or not a Christmas tree would be welcome in the common house or other 
>shared spaces.  They just assumed that no one would mind.
>
>As a nonmaterialist  by temperament and a person of Jewish and AmerInd 
>ancestry by birth, I have found this profoundly disconcerting.  If there's 
>a Christmas tree in the living room, I know for sure that *I* am not home.  
>And the very blase nature of the assumption makes me wonder how truly 
>welcoming the community is to diversity: I can't imagine a Jewish member of 
>any of these communities just nailing a mezuzah to the front doorway of the 
>common house without asking; or a Native sitting down to light the sacred 
>pipe in the living room without asking (in fact, that sounds like an 
>evictable offense to me).
>
>I think we have quite a way to go in our acceptance of and respect for our 
>diversity.
>
>

A Christmas tree in the common house was discussed and rejected on exactly
this basis two years ago at Nyland.  If I'm not mistaken (I'm out of the
loop a lot these days), it was discussed and decided it would be okay to do
this year, but in fact it was never done.

We are in the West, predominantly white and, if not predominantly Christian,
at least of predominantly Christian background.

And, actually, we have twice served at the common house a potato latkes meal
during Hanukkah, prefaced with a lighting of the menorah and concluded with
the kids playing dreidl (actually, it's the adults who end up really playing
it), and there was a Passover meal at the common house last spring.  If
someone wanted to nail a mezzuzah to the front door of the common house, I
doubt anyone would seriously object and unless it set off the fire alarms I
can't imagine anyone objecting to a sacred pipe, either.  Which is why it
doesn't seem there should be particularly strong objections to a "Christmas"
tree, if anybody wants one (even though some of us are going to insist upon
thinking of it as a pagan solstice tree).  Iin all three cases, of course,
asking, and discussing the matter, is appropriate neighborly behavior.  

We also had caroling, and a solstice ritual, at midwinter.  I was away, but
I believe I heard there was a Kwanzaa celebration as well.  At Halloween, in
addition to trick-or-treating through the community for the small fry, we
had a Samhain-type ritual for everyone around a fire in front of the common
house, including a remembering and celebrating of the dead.  At Imbolc
(Candlemas) we came to dinner carrying candles.    I personally say, any
excuse for a ritual!

I am shocked at the idea that any cohousing community would behave as you
describe. Have you brought it to their attention?

Jean