Cohousing-L Mailing List: community where you live

[BERWIN (BERWIN]

   Rob Sandelin wrote in answering Judith that one can " create community
around you, still live where you do." I've some opinions  that are more in
line with Judith's statement that organizing community where she lives is "too
formidable."

     From my experiences of the places I've lived I think if I had tried to
create serious community there, if I was lucky, would perhaps result in
knowing my neighbors a little better, but cohousing goes beyond that.  On the
other hand my neighbors might run in the other direction.
     
   There are lots of good people who have no interest in adding any new
community to their lives, they are simply too busy and already have satisfying
connections. And they don't feel the need to have these connections ten feet
away. This is just fine. I would feel uncomfortable trying to impose my needs
of community on
someone else.

 I don't want to try and convince my neighbors that we need pot lucks every
few weeks and a deeper connection. They don't have to think the way I do about
community. Their community may be their family network, church, people with
whom they gather to play cards, quilt, fish, volunteer, plan civic activities,
give support with health problems, share child care, etc. 

   At least everyone comes to cohousing (those who become members) with
similar needs for community. 

 Even the best neighborhood community lacks one thing and that's the vital
common house. Having meals and meetings indefinitely at one another's home is
not what I want and I'm assuming Judith wants that common house and all that
comes with it and I sense that a lot of you do too. It's vital, it's the hub.
Without it cohousing isn't cohousing and that can't be replicated in a
neighborhood very easily. This is the sense I have of following this list and
reading about cohousing. 

  The reason I too am reacting so strongly to your post is that my husband and
 I also can't afford cohousing and this is the type of community where we
eventually want to live. I do have an idea on this thread and I'll post that
under a separate subject.

     I know that there are some wonderful stories about creating serious
community right where you are but I just don't think it's possible
everywhere. 
Cohousing seems hard enough.   Leah Lyons