Cohousing-L Mailing List: RE: Conflict Resolution Guidelines

[Rob Sandelin (floriferous]

Some conflict resolution guidelines:

Clean up your messes. If you know you have said things or done things that
have made others angry, demoralized, or otherwise had a negative effect, it
is up to you to make it clear.

Be open to feedback. Allow others to speak about things you do and accept
their feedback with humility. We are all learning how to live together
better.

Speak so others will listen. Think about the impact of what you say before
you say it. Describe behaviors and actions, not labels.

Pay attention and ask questions
Notice the moods and activities of your neighbors and ask supporting
questions so we understand what is going on in our lives which effects our
relationships

Don't hord resentments
If something is causing you to feel resentful, analyze the exact action or
lack of action and think of solutions. bring you ideas and solutions to the
circle.

Come to the Circles.
Be present, show up, be open to the outcome that happens in the circle.


Rob Sandelin
Cedar Village permaculture retreat center (forming)
Sharingwood Cohousing (existing)

-----. Message-----
From: cohousing-l [at] freedom2.mtn.org
[mailto:cohousing-l [at] freedom2.mtn.org]On Behalf Of fwright
Sent: Wednesday, March 08, 2000 9:44 PM
To: Multiple recipients of list
Subject: Conflict Resolution Guidelines


Do any of your co-housing communities have
conflict resolution guidelines?  We at Muir
Commons are developing one and would love to
review what others have written.

Francesca Wright