Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Issues around Children in community

[Racheli&John (jnpalme]

** Reply to note from Sharon Villines <sharonvillines [at] prodigy.net> Wed, 13 
Jun 2001 14:35:24 -0400
>From Racheli

I wrote:   
> > On the other side you have some of the parents who
> > feel that the opposition is truly "anti-children".
> > How to bring these people together?

And Sharon responded:   
> Let the children negotiate the relationships. Bring the children together
> with the adults. Children need contacts with all sorts of people to grow up
> well. The adults will bend and the children will also. Parents need to
> support their children but to stay out of the way when they go into the
> world (as in leave their cribs).

We have many kids (thirty five or so), and quite a few parents -
with varying parenting styles.  The kids, obviously, are not
all of the same temperament.  They are also of widely varied
ages, so one can't expect the same of all of them.
My two and a half year old neighbor, for example, has been known
to cause some damage to my plants.  I happen to be a plant enthusiast,
but I'm also a child enthusiast, so I figure that in time she'll learn
to leave my plants alone. (and since I enjoy her, I'm ready to
be patient).  However, for some - having a child(ren) damage
their plants, (or other possessions); or for kids to make too much
noise, or leave messes - is something which they find hard
to deal with, emotionally.  Some people feel our community is 
overrun by children, and they resent it.  Some of these attitudes
might change in time (or not), but in the meantime it causes
a air amount of stress, friction, and ill feelings.


R.


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