Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: conference topics we'd like to see

[PattyMara Gourley (pattymara]

A marvelous idea, Lynn.  
It reminds me of the reality shows, warts and all, so popular on
mainstream TV.    I can see a really funny skit at the last dinner based
on Survivor.  
But more than the humor, The Dark Side is a reverential bow to the Shadow
Side which is always present, and if not recognized, and given room to
express itself, will always find a way to leak out, or explode, as the
case may be.  That sunny cheerleading we love to indulge in has its
place, but not everything is sunny in our day to day living in community.
   The shadow side needs time of its own, in a safe environment.  The
darkened room with some basic groundrules is a perfect arena to let it
out.  I predict it will be the workshop with standing room only.  

Patty Mara, Tierra Nueva, cen CA coast
where we're pretty happy these days, and also have had some trouble with
art donated to the common house, and respectfully refused.  At this point
our Art Committee accepts artwork on a temporary basis and revolves the
work every few months, or as long as they can stand it being up.   Longer
if it is popular and enjoyed, shorter if it isn't.  Sometimes they reject
a piece of art altogether.   

On Fri, 24 Jan 03 15:21:06 -0700 Lynn Nadeau <welcome [at] olympus.net>
writes:
> 
> As I scan the list of desired workshop topics for the Denver 
> conference 
> in June, I come back to an idea I've had while attending previous 
> conferences. 
> 
> I've fantasized about having a workshop called the Dark Side, 
> meeting in 
> a pitch black room with anonymity assured, talking about all the 
> ways 
> cohousing at times drives us nuts, makes us want to leave, is much 
> harder 
> than we imagined, elicits burn out, despair, pettyness, power 
> struggles, 
> email flames, nasty individuals, liability suits, gnashing of teeth 
> and 
> tearing of hair, makes you cry, or anything else that is just the 
> opposite of the sunny cheerleading we love to indulge in. Of course 
> nobody wants any potential joiners to think THEIR group might have a 
> dark 
> side, so Homeland Security would also have to weed out any wannabe 
> voyeurs who might try to slip in, prior to the issuance of the brown 
> bag 
> to go over the head...
> 
> All statements could be in the third person. "I have a friend who 
> lives 
> in a group where...."
> Just to be sure. 
> 
> Or maybe it's really as Sunshine-y everywhere in Happy Camper Coho 
> Land 
> as the publicity suggests? Oh, right! 
> 
> Lynn at RoseWind
> where we really are very happy most of the time, but are currently 
> trying 
> to figure out how to reconcile those who want provocative amateur 
> art in 
> highly-common areas even if some people don't like it, for the sake 
> of 
> spontaneity, creativity, and individual joy, and those who would 
> rather 
> have neutral stuff than things some people don't like, in common 
> areas.  
> 
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www.gourleydesign.com


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