Cohousing-L Mailing List: Needs Concerns Feelings Objections Consensus Consent

[Sharon Villines (sharon]

Becky's questions about separating needs from solutions raised another
situation we found ourselves in. In proposal presentations, we were being
asked about our concerns and would work very hard at coming up with
everything we could think of -- bouncing off each other, raising every
possible problem or opportunity the proposal raised.

The team presenting the proposal would then throw up their hands and say
"This is impossible! We will never reach consensus! This will take forever!"

But they never asked the question, "Do you object to our doing this?" Often
the concerns raised were only concerns, not objections.

They were concerns about things the proposal did not address but we were
saying needed to be addressed soon -- this proposal is not the end of this
issue. Concerns about what might happen -- warnings, alerts. Concerns about
what might not happen. But they were not objections to the question -- can
we do this?

By comparison, the sociocratic definition of consensus/consent as "no
objection" is so direct and workable. Listening to concerns is important
when determining where action is needed, but not necessarily when a proposal
for action is made.

Sharon
-- 
Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
http://www.takomavillage.org



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