Cohousing-L Mailing List: RE: rules for participation

[Rob Sandelin (floriferous]

Your group is in a delicate stage. Many people are attracted to the end
result of community living, but find the work required to be more than they
can deal with. Be careful that you don't shoot yourself in the foot by
imposing rules that cause people to leave, especially when you don't need
to. The advice I give most every group is:
For every meeting their should be two parties.

If it aint fun, and if its not building relationships, you need to rethink
your meeting processes. There are several ways to do this, but more than
anything its an attitude. If meetings feel good, then people will come to
them. If meetings give people stomach aches, why would they volunteer to do
that to themselves? 

Unequal participation is normal. Robs rule of participation is  25% are
heavily and regularily involved, 25% are lightly and irregularly involved,
and 50% cycle between the two at various times. Give the 25% that are
regular lots of kudos, support and love, they will provide the leadership to
make things happen. You need them, and they can be easily lost if they are
treated badly.

Rob Sandelin
Sharingwood 

-----Original Message-----
From: Lynette Bassman [mailto:lbassman [at] alliant.edu] 
Sent: Sunday, January 30, 2005 11:40 AM
To: cohousing-l [at] cohousing.org
Subject: [C-L]_ rules for participation

Hi, all.
 
I am a member of the Fresno Cohousing group.  After having our initial
presentation in September, we have now formed an LLC with 15 enthusiastic
families, and are looking for land.  We'll be bidding on a parcel this week.
As we develop our operating procedures, and as we move out of the initial
excitement phase, and into this next phase that entails lots and lots of
meetings, we are finding that there are a few members that haven't signed up
for committees, and some that are on committees, but they don't really
participate.  A few people rarely come to meetings.  We are looking for
ideas on how to handle this that are consistent with the cooperative nature
of cohousing.  What have your groups done about this, or was it an issue for
your groups?  We would appreciate hearing about your experiences of what
worked and what didn't.
 
Thanks.
 
Lynette Bassman
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