Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: response to Rules and Regs and cooperation

[amelia roache (claymandala]

  Amelia to Cohousing-L
  Compassionate Communication April 26
   
  When we hear eachother with the intent of meeting needs, making clear 
observations  of action and feelings rather than diagnosis, judgement or blame 
there is no such thing as a mental illness or any other label of a human being 
that does not enrich life.
  There is a process I practice I will share with anyone who is interested.
  San Diego Nonviolent Communication

Diane <dianeclaire [at] gmail.com> wrote:
  Diane to Cohousing-L
More options Apr 22 (21 hours ago)

>
> EVERYONE is going to act according to ego and self-interest-except in
> cases
> of mental illness. Now, if you want to identify people who do the
> sociological function of "defection" rather than "cooperation" then you
> are
> more neutral and more objective-but those terms aren't "good" and "bad",
> they're just strategy.


Not all sociology or sociologists would say that. This one, wrote a book
about the self and values (Fabric of the Self: A Theory of Ethics and
Emotions -- Yale, 1998 -- please excuse the shameless promotion, but do read
it :-)). True, in contemporary market-oriented societies acting according
to ego and self-interest is most common. But even in this most
individualistic of societies most of us do define ourselves in a broad range
of ways, one of which is as members of a group. Concepts of good and bad
vary in fairly patterned ways depending on the nature of the group. For
cohousers the group is sometimes our cohousing community. In this context
we are asked to come to consensus by considering what is best for the
cohousing community rather than thinking in narrow self-interested terms.
We do this without being mentally ill. Indeed, a growing body of research
indicates that humans are healthier in every way the more they think of
themselves and live as members of groups.
Diane Margolis
Cambridge Cohousing
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