Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Why I like Cohousing

[Craig Ragland (craigragland]

Well, its my truth - but I do not speak for our community. I am a voice for
Songaia, not the voice of Songaia. I answered Sharon's question, "why I like
cohousing" - I did so in the abstract, rather than sharing specific
instances of sharing, acceptance, relationship, leadership, creativity, etc.
I've got experiences that support my abstractions, but if anyone reads
between the lines of the concrete examples in this thread you'll find other
evidence of just how special a life in a cohousing community can be.

It is all to easy for folks who are "comparison shopping" for community to
focus on the details that are not to their liking, or to project much onto
brief observations. Its also easy for cohousers to dwell on the challenges
of life together - and trying to fix them is quite popular. I'm pleased
that many cohousers really do appreciate just how special a life in
community so often is - especially when contrasted with what is easily
obtainable within most conventional housing, e.g. anonymous suburbia or
apartment buildings.

As humans, we all bring our emotional and spirit baggage when we arrive in
community and, as much as some would like, we simply cannot check it at the
door as we engage in lives lived together. Living together surfaces some of
this otherwise hidden stuff. Sometimes, a focus on baggage and
reverberations lead us to exit community. Other times we find ways to accept
each other - at least enough. In the times I most enjoy, we direct our
attention to what is good and how to grow that. At the current moment, my
choice is to do what I can to embrace and extend Cohousing as something that
is good. I hope my local and global actions help my community and Coho/US to
do more of the same - and I hope more Coho-L readers can similarly
appreciate the many sweet gifts that each day in community can bring us and
those we live with.

Credits Due: the baggage metaphor came from the consultation Diana Leafe
Christian writes about in the current issue of Cohousing magazine:

*http://www.cohousing.org/cm/article/different* <http://www.cohousing.org/>
(although this article does not address that part of the consultation)


On Thu, Jun 19, 2008 at 9:27 PM, Gerald Manata <gmanata2003 [at] yahoo.com>
wrote:

>      If what you say is true, your place is more special than you realize.
>
>
> *Craig Ragland <craigragland [at] gmail.com>* wrote:
>
>
> Because we have the very special opportunity to create our own
> micro-cultures, which are a part of the broader world and not apart from it
> - with 113 cohousing communities, we are growing into a profound,
> high-impact population - and some have created really special places where
> we live good lives that can serve as models for many, especially as we
> authentically open ourselves up to others.
>
> Because my neighbors really, truly care for me and vice versa - and
> concrete
> examples abound in most cohouser's experiences, including earlier posts.
>
> Because we co-create with each other, accepting many of our differences and
> forgiving many of our lapses - it is much easier to create things of value
> when we gift each other with the honest permission to fail. At times, in my
> past, I have been so fearful of failure, that I didn't even try, but now...
> heh heh
>
> With most of my neighbors, I am able to just let my hair down and not worry
> (much) about their misunderstandings around the meaning of my words - if
> provoked, most just ask, rather than project "badness" on me when I trigger
> strong emotion. Most folks at Songaia assume my intent is pure-of-heart and
> that I'm doing the best I can, as I stumble forward, co-creating our
> community's rich life.
>
> --
> Craig Ragland
>
> Coho/US executive director
> http://www.cohousing.org
> craig [at] cohousing.org
>
> Please try email first, include your phone number (w/time zone) - or give
> me
> a call: 425-487-3550 (Pacific)... communicate!
> _________________________________________________________________
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>
>
>
>
-- 
Craig Ragland

Coho/US executive director
http://www.cohousing.org
craig [at] cohousing.org

Please try email first, include your phone number (w/time zone) - or give me
a call: 425-487-3550 (Pacific)... communicate!