Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: consensus process

[Racheli Gai (racheli]

I agree with all of these comments.
I want to underline the fact that consensus requires actual presence  
in the meeting(s),
so that people can hear each other and shifts may occur.

Switching from complete vagueness to using CT Butler's book,  has helped
our process a whole lot.
We also had him come and work with us a couple of times - something I  
highly recommend.
It won't solve all of your problems, but once people have a basic  
structure they agree on,
it makes the work way more doable.

Racheli, Sonora Cohousing, Tucson.


On Mar 24, 2011, at 10:15 AM, Lynn Nadeau / Maraiah wrote:
> I highly recommend the process we've used at RoseWind (Port Townsend
> WA) for many years: CT Butler's "On Conflict and Consensus", available
> free on line at www.ic.org/pnp/ocac. I never quite understood why
> Butler and Rothstein call their method "Formal Consensus", but
> compared to "informal definitions", it's very structured. By the time
> one has diligently gone through Level One, Level Two, and Level Three,
> there should be plenty of clarity about any concerns people have, and
> why. Standing Aside is a choice, but by the time a proposal has been
> adequately processed to merit a call for consensus, there are rarely
> more than a couple stand asides. If we had a situation like you
> reference, with 12 approving and 10 standing aside, I think our
> facilitators would find that to be such a lukewarm consensus that it
> would go back to committee.
>
> On doing it "by household", I don't see how this aligns with the basic
> idea of consensus. The Quakers say "Everyone has a piece of the
> truth", and it's rare for spouses to think and feel alike. We treat
> each person as an individual. As a one-person household, I have the
> same value of input as each member of a couple. This isn't a vote.
>
> Another recent thread dealt with proxies. Since consensus process is
> not a vote, how can this work? It is more common than not, that
> members shift their opinions in the course of the process of hearing
> from others and examining in more detail the underlying goals and
> concerns and possible creative win-win solutions. If we all just sent
> in our "vote" ahead of time, why even bother with the process?
>
> No method is perfect: more than 20 years in, we are still learning.
> And the Butler book has been a highly useful guide. I recommend it.
>
> Maraiah Lynn Nadeau
> www.rosewind.org
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