Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Cohesiveness of community after a sale?

[R Philip Dowds (rphilipdowds]

Great question(s).  At Cornerstone Cohousing, we’re still working on this 
(we’ll probably always be working on this), and don’t pretend to have all the 
answers.  But I’ll share some of our experience and thinking to date:

      (1) We have ROFR built into our master deed from the year 2000.  The idea 
is that (a) Cornerstone can insist that sellers present the association with a 
(partially redacted) purchase and sale offer, and then (b) Cornerstone can 
“take over” this offer by transferring it to some other buyer we “like better”. 
 Cornerstone itself never buys or owns a unit, even transitionally.  But 
historically, we've NEVER USED ROFR.  First, we tend to feel it’s intrusive on 
the “private” transaction of a valued friend and neighbor who wants to sell; 
and second, we worry about stumbling on some prohibition of fair housing law.  
Meanwhile, we’re told that ROFR inteferes with reverse mortgages, which 
potentially allow some of our older members to afford staying at Cornerstone 
after they retire.  So:  We are currently looking at removing ROFR from our 
master deed.

      (2) Many communities seem to maintain a successful and useful waiting 
list.  On the other hand, cohousing units do not turn over with the same 
regularity as do “ordinary” HOA units, so maintaining a viable and relevant 
waiting list can be a lot of work, and in the end, irrelevant.  My personal 
view is that if you want a relevant “waiting list”, you should try to invest it 
with more value.  This could mean (a) insist on an annual registration fee 
($50???); (b) consistently invite waiting list members to your community events 
(e.g., special meals, lectures, game day, whatever); and (c) encourage list 
members to show up for work contributions, like a spring yard clean-up.

      (3) The association “approves” a buyer?  ???  I’ll hasten past all the 
ins and outs of fair housing law, but if you engage in “approving” one buyer 
over another, you may inviting a discrimination law suit.  Personally, I’d stay 
far away from anything that looks like the association “approving” one  
candidate, and “rejecting” another.

So: What do we do at Cornerstone?  We confess that we’ve heavily and 
shamelessly plagiarized from Ann Zabaldo at Takoma Village — and we’ve 
established a “marketing team” that “helps” all of our willing sellers to sell 
their units.  Some of the activities of this team include …
Helping to advertise availability.
Helping to “show” the unit.
Meeting with candidate buyers.
Explaining participation expectations.  More specifically, emphasing that 
sustaining relatively low monthly dues is supported when community “members” 
invest time in management and chores.
Explaining social expectations.  More specifically, emphasizing that we value 
household-to-household reciprocity of helping out.  And getting to know (and 
respect) the backstories everyone brings with them.
Helping candidates find the professionals — vendor sources — that can assist 
with the burdens of moving, and setting up a new residence.
… And so on.  All of which, (1) attracts households with communitarian 
instincts.  And (2), scares off households without.  We are NOT real estate 
attorneys or real estate brokers, and we don’t imply that we are.  But 
sometimes or often our “help” is substantial, and grateful sellers may make a 
voluntary cash contribution (typically four figures, but one time, five) back 
to Cornerstone.

———————————
Thanks,
Philip Dowds
Cornerstone Cohousing
Cambridge, MA

> On Jul 19, 2025, at 2:55 PM, Christine Cook Mania <christine.d.cook [at] 
> gmail.com> wrote:
> 
> We're forming a new cohousing community and we are thinking about how to
> maintain the cohesiveness of the community when someone sells their unit.
> We want to ensure the new buyer is committed to being an active participant
> of the community and would like some review of the prospective buyer before
> the sale is completed. We have come up with three different options:
> 
>   1. One of the ideas we are considering is for our community to have the
>   "right of first refusal" to buy the unit. For any community that does
>   establish a "right of first refusal" on the sale of a unit, what do you do
>   to actually exercise it?
>   2. Another way is to maintain a waiting list of qualified buyers.
>   3. And another way is to add something to our by-laws requiring the
>   approval of the "condo association" of the buyer.
> 
> We are curious to know what existing communities are doing?
> 
> Warmly,
> Christine
> 
> 
> ___________________________________
> Christine Cook Mania, MA, RYT-200
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