Cohousing-L Mailing List: Effects of kids on a community

[Rob Sandelin (floriferous]

I live in a community with 34 kids  and 45 adults. At times it feels like I
live in a pre-school. The  sheer number of kids makes parties  very kid
focused, for example our Halloween party last night was focused mostly on
kids. I know this kid centeredness irritates  some of the single adults,
others find it tolerable, a few actively enjoy it.

As a parent I find it a mixed  blessing. At times it is very difficult to
make  time with my kids, they  have SO many other opportunities with their
friends. And then there are all the dramas  between kids who can be as
unkind and rude to each other as anything I have ever seen adults do. Of
course, doing  circles  and teaching peace and communication to kids is
great work. But it does wear on  one after a time.

So in my community, kids have become a filter. The kid energy attracts  more
parents with kids, and drives away non-parents or elders with grown kids,
who don't want to live in a pre-school. It is hard to get any elders on our
waiting list, they come, see the kid chaos and say, this would have been a
great place to raise our kids.........

Rob Sandelin
Sharingwood