Re: Frustration in Forming Community
From: Sharon Villines (sharonsharonvillines.com)
Date: Fri, 28 May 2004 07:40:38 -0700 (PDT)

On May 26, 2004, at 2:15 PM, rdbeckia [at] io.com wrote:

I admit that we have invited only friends and acquaintances to our
preliminary meetings. We have discussed how to broaden our scope, but are
leery of attracting folks that are not aligned with our vision.

 It's more productive
to say "We're founding a vegan Methodist income-generating commune in
downtown Dime Box," and recruit people who share that vision, than it is
to get a group of friends together and figure out what you all have in
common, other than being friends who crave community.

And then within this vision, you also have to be open to new things. Even if you vision is very clear it will be interpreted and changed in ways that you couldn't have conceived when you started. You have to start from a bottom line but then be open. One reason for the emphasis on diversity in cohousing is because diversity is necessary if a community is going to be built in 2-5 years in a chosen location. Otherwise you have to build from a different premise -- charismatic leader who attracts funds on the basis of a belief system, for example, and builds on land donated by a true believer.

Once you are moved in, you will find that many people have interpreted the original vision very differently. The faster you get built the wider this variation will be because people have not had time to see these differences and drop out before they moved in. But the community will still work.

Some people leave (and you will wish that some others would) but the differences will work themselves out based in practicality. What works will work. What won't will get dropped. Once you move in, you yourself may even start planning a new community based on what you have learned from this one, but in the meantime you will be living in community and living a much richer life than you would have otherwise.

Focus on successive approximations, not a perfect solutions. You will not only be happier, you will get built.

Sharon
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Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
http://www.takomavillage.org


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