Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Peace is a Co-housing issue

[Larry Miller (larry.miller]

"For me, I view cohousing communities as being those communities which are 
actualizing the
principles of cooperation, environmentalism, and peace."

I was one of those who requested that the discussion was not an appropriate 
subject for the list
serve.  My purpose in suggesting that was based, not on opposition to the 
subject, but on a
sense of what makes cohousing work - or not work. Cohousing doesn't work for 
everyone. After
several years in cohousing and observing where I and others had the most 
trouble adapting, it is
my conclusion that the biggest impediment is a preconceived notion of what 
people who are in
cohousing believe in or agree on. 

Everyone moves into cohousing for the first time with some set of expectations 
on what it means.
The reality is that, while there may be a philosophical agreement about 
environment, diversity,
peace, etc., there tends to be little agreement on what that means in detail. 
As soon as one
starts thinking that others "should" behave in a certain way because "we are 
cohousing," it
leads to disappointment and difficulty in getting comfortable in the uniqueness 
of your
particular group of neighbors. 

Larry Miller
Oak Creek Commons