|Re: Bullying||<– Date –> <– Thread –>|
|From: R.N. Johnson (cohorandayahoo.com)|
|Date: Wed, 9 Feb 2011 16:20:20 -0800 (PST)|
That sounds like a very painful and even frightening situation. I have a few suggestions. I agree with Sharon that the authorities need to be brought to deal with dangerous illegal behavior, such as the bb gun shootings. It sounds like your meetings are held hostage at the moment. I would start by talking individually or in small groups to neighbors who may be supportive, and developing a strategy together before tackling the larger group. Support each other as much as you can. When you talk with the bullies, be calmly assertive, and name the problematic behaviors. State what you see as the issues with their behavior factually without resorting to name calling, yelling or putdowns. Bullies count on intimidation.If you don't follow their script, many will back down. Some people are what I think of as well intentioned bullies; they think of themselves as acting for the good of others even while acting like holy terrors. I have seen this type of person respond and change behavior when gently and respectfully called on their bullying. I won't say they are getting any Miss Manners awards now, but the bullying has been greatly reduced. If you frame the issue as improving communication, creating more effective meetings, or conflict resolution training you may be able to get agreement on some outside intervention. Whether or not the group agrees to pay, I do think you should get outside assistance as soon as you can. Randa Johnson
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