Cohousing-L Mailing List: consensus or groupthink

[CJ Q (homeschoolvideo]

We have had 3 families leave and no one mentioned consensus but now that I
think of it, that had something to do with why I left.  I have lots of
experience with consensus with 4 years at a Quaker college and running the
radio station there and at a Democratic school and it was never a problem,
sometimes annoying, but that was the extent of it.
I just had an experience this week that sheds light onto the way consensus
was used that seemed more like groupthink than making decisions.  A similar
issue came up with a facebook group and many wrote their opinions and
discussed and had varying opinions and no problem. But in cohousing and,
even with the mediator, there seemed to be pressure to t to hold onto one
opinion and not even hear dissenting ideas and it was an emotional issue -
not something like construction in the Common House.  So, those who don't
agree just don't say anything.  I noticed the same thing happened with the
budget - not much discussion or wanting to figure out different methods.
Even in Laird's blog he discusses outliers a lot and that confuses me.  Is
cohousing and community living just pressure to all think the same?