Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: How do you find the time?

[MelaSilva (MelaSilva]

In a message dated 96-07-11 12:01:02 EDT, Ginger writes:
>How do you find the time?  Would be interested to know if groups 
>which *do* have lots of children have more trouble getting parents to serve 
>on committees, etc.  Any creative solutions (especially for the development
phase)?

Many of us quit having lives! We quit seeing friends, quit joining
activities, quit volunteering at school and church. Look at it this way: If
you were building your home from leveling the ground to cutting the wood to
running the electricity, just you and your nuclear family, how long would it
take you? How much time and energy would you have for anything else? Assuming
you were working full time, how long would it take you? 2 or 3 years seems
reasonable. That is what you are doing. You are building your family a home.
It is an all consuming task for quite a while. Instead of nailing 2 by 4's,
you have to work out details with lots of other people. Instead of pouring
concrete, you have to lay down a foundation of trust. It takes time, other
things move to the background for a while. Not forever, but for now, accept
that you can only do so much, and your home has priority. 

Mela Silva
Southside Park
Sacramento CA