Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Guest Rooms and strangers

[Becky Schaller (bschaller]

Rob Sandelin wrote:
 If all of us
> in the first wave of cohousing, who have opened our homes and communities
> for those who came after us had never been willing to share our experiences,
> I suspect cohousing would be much poorer for it.

> There is a balancing point between giving something to help others grow, and
> giving so much you resent it.

And here I was thinking that after we had all our units sold, we 
wouldn't need to do marketing anymore!  

Rob, your email made me think about how this question in a different 
way.  I think  one factor that's important in feeling good about giving 
is that you give of your own choice.  When visitors come and expect your 
time and attention and it's feeling like an invasion, then it's no 
wonder that people want to withdraw. 
 
I wonder if part of the key lies in creating boundaries, perhaps very 
strict boundaries, for when you are on display and when you are not.  I 
assume other groups have done this.  What does it look like?  And how 
successful are you in being able to tell people that this is not a good 
time to visit.

Becky Schaller
Sonora Cohousing
Tucson, AZ  
Where we can't wait to get to the point when our tours will be of a 
completed community.