Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: boderline off topic

[WOLF1GDSFM (WOLF1GDSFM]

<< the responses to my questions make me feel 
 chastised and or ignorant. >>

I can't find the questions to which you refer, or the responses, but I do 
remember quite vividly that the first time I posted here, the response I got 
left me feeling chastised and ignorant too--before the whole world, no less.

My experiences in an actual cohousing community have been much more 
compassionate and supportive than many of the responses I have seen on this 
list.  In fact, I went to my neighbor here in the community with the hurt I 
felt after reading the response to my first post.

Unfortunately, it seems to me that one must be rather thick-skinned to post 
to cohousing-l.  On the other hand, a particularly thick skin is not required 
to be part of cohousing in general.  There are some who thrive on argument, 
and some who do not.  There are a few  with sharp tongues and many who are 
very kind and considerate.  I tend to associate with those who treat me with 
respect and kindness, and I find plenty of them in cohousing.

Couhousing-l has a lot of useful information, so I continue to read it.  
Reading some posts, I kind of cringe when I think that this might be some 
person's introduction to cohousing.  It is one thing to be dealing with a 
group in which every one knows every one else, and sharp rebukes and 
criticisms can be taken against a background of prior acquaintance.  It is 
quite another situation when one is new.

Speaking personally, I am rather inarticulate and thin-skinned, and I thrive 
in cohousing.  I think that moving into cohousing is the best single thing I 
ever did.  Please don't let whatever response you received here discourage 
you.

Jan Ankney
Sunward Cohousing
Ann Arbor, Michigan
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