Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: Choosing units

[Sharon Villines (sharon]

On Monday, March 17, 2003, at 11:10  AM, Dahako [at] aol.com wrote:

> Experienced condo/townhouse cohousers out there – please cast your 
> mind back.  Remember the week or two before your group had the 
> momentous day when each household got to pick a unit for its very own? 
>  How did you handle the swirl of feelings?  Did your group provide 
> space and time for discussion of choices?  Negotiation between members 
> when there were overlaps?

I've done this in two groups and the best way was to have a priority 
order established by the date of making a financial commitment to the 
group, and having a process for people to express an interest in other 
units. Sometimes the person who chose the first unit would be equally 
happy with another. You need a process for allowing this to be 
expressed while you also assure people that they are not wasting their 
time working with a group when in the end they will not get an 
acceptable unit. The spirit of community can only be stretched so far. 
People who need a three bedroom unit or one bedroom unit want to know 
they will get one.

> Looking back on it now, how important is it to you that you got the 
> unit you got?
In neither instance did I get my first choice. The first project never 
got built so I don't know how I would have felt. I joined the second 
group later in the process so the choices were this one or that one. I 
love my unit. The things I would change would not have been affected by 
having other choices. No matter how good your design is, there will 
always be things you would change if you had it to do over again. In 
the end, housing is like money-- once your basic needs are met, having 
more isn't really so important in terms of happiness.

And two years down the road, we are having unit swaps as one household 
left and others are playing musical chairs. Wanting to swap has more to 
do with life changes than not  liking the original unit -- adding or 
subtracting spouses or children or parents. Needing to live without 
stairs, etc.

Sharon
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Sharon Villines
Takoma Village Cohousing, Washington DC
http://www.takomavillage.org
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