Cohousing-L Mailing List: Re: RE: Consensus: late blocks (TR Ruddick)

[Rob Sandelin (floriferous]

The root word of consensus is consent, which means, gives permission. It has 
nothing to do with whether an individual agrees with a decision, in fact 
many times in a diverse group a person would be expected to give permission 
for a group to go ahead with a decision they disagree with.  Consensus is 
not unanimous agreement, its unamimous permission to go ahead.  Often people 
new to collaboration  mistake their own experience for reality, and beleive 
they know the answers without having to hear anybody else.  More experienced 
collaborators know that their own experiences are limited, and the value of 
collaboration is to draw out the things which they do not know and never 
experienced, so that the group has the maximum information and perspectives 
available to choose from.

Blocking because I disagree can be a sign of lack of humility and an over 
reliance upon my own perspective as being the best one.  In my observations 
it takes two or three exposures to your limited perspective, in order to 
understand the limitations and value of bringing out things you did not 
know.  There are some high ego attached people who take longer, and it is 
possible may never understand or accept that their experiences and 
perspectives are not the only ones.

This HAS to be experienced in order to be fully understood, and once it is 
understood, you can understand how humility is an important foundation of 
collaborative decision making.

Rob Sandelin
Sharingwood Community
Snohomish County, WA

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